BOOK OF TRUTH 22

Before we got into finishing the book this evening, the discussion took a turn surrounding those age-old questions of “what are we doing here and why are we doing it.”

The answers that come to me right now are fairly simple. Even though they are not explanations that the intellect will be glad to hear, they do some how satisfy my need to know and also leave the door open for deeper understanding.

God or Love or Oneness or whatever term we might use at this moment, is not a static entity. It is continually evolving Energy. Because we are part of that evolution, we are also continuing to evolve. We exist as an identity and also as an “I am.”

The challenge that I run into quite often is to continue to think that my forgetfulness of who I truly am is some sort of error that my soul keeps making and that there must be something the matter with me because I cannot seem to align myself to the Divine truth of who I am all the time!

What I failed to recognize is that my forgetfulness is also an aspect of my learning and that my learning is part of my evolution and that all of this has been chosen by my inner being as a way of growing and contributing to the evolution of the whole.

It is not an error; it is a choice of learning and growth. In some ways it might be looked upon as my (chosen) curriculum for this lifetime.

And then for a moment there we dipped our toe into the infinite sea of awareness and realized that what we speak of as being one incarnation after another is simply our intellectual need to put things in the framework of linear time. Where is most of those who study mysticism and metaphysics realize that all of these lifetimes whether on planet Earth or other places are all happening now. Do not even try to digest that, just let the truth of it sink in.

A sheep found a hole in the fence and crept through it. He wandered far and lost his way back.

Then he realized that he was being followed by a wolf. He ran and ran, but the wolf kept chasing him, until the shepherd came and rescued him and carried him lovingly back to the fold.

In spite of everyone's urging to the contrary, the shepherd refused to nail up the hole in the fence.    Anthony de Mello

I found great consolation in many of the parts of this reading tonight.

It is quite easy to get lost in what I call the “comparison trip”, not only comparison with others, but comparison to my idea or my sense of where I think I oughta be. My perception of myself or my spiritual state is simply that--a perception, and perception comes from my limited self. Sometimes, perhaps always, the best answer to these Eternal questions that touch my soul are, ”I don't know.”

Along with all of that, each one of our journeys, each one of our chosen aspects of learning, is profound and unique. And from moment to moment, we are continually asked to surrender, to let go of the thinking mind’s need to figure things out, and to know that no matter what seems to be going on inside or outside that we are in the realm of perfect knowing. It is emphasized throughout this section that you will receive at the level of your own readiness--not where you think you should be, but in the Perfection of where you are right now.

“As you confront these aspects of the self, you may be challenged for a moment, but we would only ask you not to go back and hide in the dark and cling the very thing to you that you say you would like to release. The tidal wave of truth will find its way there, as well, and will lift you and it to the Source of all things so that you may be reknown.”

As we continue this work all of our stuff our attachments our preconceived notions all that might hold us back at exactly the appropriate time and space comes bubbling up to the surface to be healed and to be released. this can cause a certain amount of discomfort physically and emotionally what is a teacher friend of mine likes to say when it's up it's on its way out. Like a fever reaching its highest point before it can break release.

“To die to the old life you have known is to be born anew, and the death of the old self, while not a death as you can understand it, is what is going on in a certain way. As we recalibrate you each in your systems, in the vibrations you have chosen to operate as, what is null and void is in release. And some of you may be experiencing this in the physical self or the emotional self as weariness or pain or loss.”

Throughout this section, as well, in alignment with our sense of the unique aspects of our journey, is also the instruction to let go of the expectations you might have of how the results of your growth or your evolution are going to show up. It would be like praying for something and having a preconceived notion of how that prayer is going to be answered. And so we are focusing on this one spot here when the answer to that prayer is happening all around us but we cannot see.

“Now their experiences may vary. Their expectations of what the experience should be in some ways claims them in a limited manner that may actually preclude the gifts from being received that we are offering. But still they receive on a level of vibration, on the level that they can hold of the truth of their being that is always here as them.”

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“In this choice to be as my True Self, I align all choices to the authority of the True Self so all that I choose may be in agreement to truth. I am Word through this intention. Word I am Word.”

BOOK OF TRUTH 21

The group this evening help to clarify what we mean by personality self/ small self /Divine self Christ Consciousness Etc. What we sometimes fail to realize is that all of these are levels of consciousness or awareness and they are either chosen consciously or unconsciously by and “I” or “me” that is the central character of this whole journey.

I can become caught up in my limited consciousness and think that a personality self is who or what I am. There are other times in my awareness or evolution that I am able to cut through the illusion and know on a deeper level the truth of who I am-- this unique aspect of the Divine that is choosing to express itself through this chosen vehicle that I sometimes referred to as my personality self. It is not who I am and yet it is the lens through which the light that I am shines through. The clearer I am or the more aligned I am to my Divine truth, the clearer and more obvious the light that shines through. But even here there are lessons that I have chosen to learn, even when my perception of light might be limited.

I shared this quote from Merton with our Sunday class and it offers a wonderful description and paradox about who and what we are and the movement behind this journey that we are all making.

“Finally I am coming to the conclusion that my highest ambition is to be what I already am. That I will never fulfill my obligation to surpass myself unless I first accept myself, and if I accept myself fully in the right way, I will already have surpassed myself.” Thomas Merton (Here is a marvelous, paradoxical thought combining aspects of the personality and Divine self in a way that only the soul can understand.)

Here is another one:

"I am this emptiness, silence, the absolutely real, eternal, omnipresent Being and the only Real Substance of all the universe."

Coming to the end of our book, this lesson reflected again on memory, and the release of all that no longer serves me.

“The Christed Self, the what that you are, is the one that does this work, not the small self who thinks she knows everything. The Divine as what you are is the one who is lifting you to the level of vibration or alignment where this is even possible. The replication of memory will be released in this claim, which simply means that, because it was, it no longer is, because the True Self will claim what you need in the moment you stand in.”

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“The quality of life that you have right now is dependent upon your perception of what quality means. In the alignment to truth and in the knowing of what you are, you may reclaim all things. And the announcement we give you—“You are here, you are here, you are here”—is the trumpet song that you announce yourself to the world in. When the trumpet sings, many awaken to their own Divine Selves.”

“We are ready to teach, and the culmination of this text is about to commence, this day and tomorrow. We would like to require the reader to remember only one thing. The choices that they make are always theirs. How they choose is up to them as well. And as they claim their true inheritance, the Divine as them, the choices that they make will be in agreement to the truth of what they are, and herein your lives become effortless. You are no longer in a quandary about what to do because you operate from a place of knowing that is not embellished with the dictates of others, culture, or religion, but ascribed to truth. And in truth you may know and have your being.”

Through this work that we are doing and the work that the guides are doing with us, we are essentially becoming more aware of who we truly are as well as making the conscious decision to be aligned with that truth. You will notice there are two steps here-- the awareness and the knowing of Who You Are,  and then the conscious alignment to that truth.

“On this day I am free of what I have known that would seek to hinder me from the new, that would seek to prohibit me from claiming the new and my true inheritance. I claim this of my own free will, and in this choice I make, I align to my potential as the one who may know and be in this expression of the Kingdom. I know who I am in truth. I know what I am in truth. I know how I serve in truth. I am free. I am free. I am free.”

I am free of the structures and definitions of the past that up until this time have dictated my thoughts and my actions and my beliefs. In gratitude I stand on the edge of this present moment and although my mind might not know where it takes me, my Spirit knows that my growth and evolution in awareness are an inevitable and continuing part of this journey.

“Now the claim that was just made was simply about allowance and agreement to allow the new to hold, the new to claim you. As you seek the Kingdom, you don’t see what is present. And the Kingdom, as we said, is here. So in your being, in the claim we make and you agree to, you support the shift in awareness, in knowing and realization that is required to see the sun that still shines even through the leaves. The gift of this is that regardless of the circumstance you stand in, you will be able to realize that you are not without the light that is always present, even when the shadows seek to overtake.”

In other words, you do not seek the Kingdom--It is already here.

And we close with an absolutely beautiful declaration of Truth:

“As I claim my freedom, I offer my hands, that they may be used in fullness. I offer my body, that it may be reknown by me in its Divine nature. I offer my emotions, that they may be lifted and reformed to be in service to my own awareness of truth. And I lift my mind and all that is in it to liberation from the known that I have used to define myself in fear or in solitude or in ways that do not serve my usefulness as a conduit, as an expression of the True Source of my being. As I gift myself to my Source to be released from all bondage, all known in fear or limitation, I am gifted in response by the light of my truth that I may be claimed in inheritance. I know who I am as the one who receives, who is giving in response, and who says yes, I am h”“giving in response, and who says yes, I am here, I am here, I am here.”

And May all beings be at peace; may all beings be free of suffering and may all beings rememver who they are.

BOOK OF TRUTH 20

P. 318-324

(I shared this with our Sun. Morning group)

I came across this quote from Eckhart Tolle:

“Many people who are going through the early stages of the awakening process are no longer certain what their outer purpose is. What drives the world no longer drives them. Seeing the madness of our civilization so clearly, they may feel somewhat alienated from the culture around them. Some feel that they inhabit a no-man's-land between two worlds. They are no longer run by the ego, yet the arising awareness has not yet become fully integrated into their lives.”

After being “insulted”  (how quickly the personality intrudes!) at being called a beginner, even though I am, I decided to examine this quote more deeply.

I know I can identify with his observation, but I have to clarify that this perception of being lost or confused or hanging out in the void is the perception of my limited personality self. My true nature/Christ Consciousness, knows exactly who he/she is.

I would suggest that what he is getting at is that as our consciousness/awareness shifts from simply a human/personality identity to the living Truth of who we are, we find that how we relate to the world and the personalities we are surrounded by, changes. And because we are still somewhat identified with our personality self, our old judgmental reactions are still here. Unfortunately, then we get into judging ourselves, thinking; “I’m better than this; I know I am not my body and neither is this other person. I really do know I am a child of God and so are they, but her eI am reacting in my old self-self-centered way.”

The personality/ego self is continually looking for “rule books” here.”When this happens what do I do?” But in this aspect of the growth and evolution we are involved in, there are no rule books. As the philosopher Heraclitus exclaimed, “You can’t step in the river twice.” The river is different; you re different, even your perception yourself and the situation is different, if you allow yourself to be aware of it.

The personality is always attempting to fix something that it perceives is broken, but eventually we run out of “duct tape.” The Divine Self realizes that a broken system or method is a sign that it needs to be transcended. The system, whether it e a family dynamic or a form of government has served its purpose; it’s “brokenness” is a sign that its usefulness has expired.

We have all probably had the experience when we have held onto something too long. I recall one of my cousins had a “blankie” that she dragged around everywhere. After in numerable washings and patching it just finally fell apart.

We might even have experienced relationships that were important to us that began to deteriorate in one way or another. We worked diligently attempting to “fix” it and perhaps the other person did as well. If you are able to change the dynamics of the relationship or how you define it, perhaps you are able to continue to have a relationship with that person, but its essence has changed.

More than likely after trying  and trying, the relationship began to disintegrate. The personality self does not want to see that , and so it will create an illusion that everything is OK. It is not usually until some painful time has passed that we realize we have held onto this old form too long.

We are not suggesting the effort was useless, because all efforts can be part of our learning, it is just act there are times, if we are honest and aware, we will realize the need for letting go of the old, with the realization that it no longer serves us, is the most loving action to take.

“Now, the climate you stand in, in the room you sit in, the walk you take to work, is still acclimated to the prior self and her choices. But the one who has aligned to truth will now reclaim things in her purview. “I know who I am in truth. I know what I am in truth. I know how I serve in truth.”

The alignment in these claims is deeply significant. There is nothing cosmetic about them at all. They will restructure you because the agreement to be as truth will touch all things. The wave that we described earlier that washes away that which is unstable or out of alignment with truth is encompassing you now. And the joy of this is the release of the old and the claiming of the new, what lives beyond the threshold.”

In this teaching the guides first continually affirm the truth of who you are. It is only after this affirmation is taken in as deeply as you can, in this moment, that we begin to look at the beliefs and actions of the past as being an impediment to the continual recognition of the truth of who you are.

“Now, where we take you next in this teaching is to outside of the world that you know and to the Kingdom and its manifestation. The triumph of the text is that the ones who listen and heed the call are being prepared for the work of their lives, not the work that they would choose as the small self, but the work of their lives. And we would say all the lives you’ve known yourself through have been in preparation for this level of reidentification as the what that you are. And the claims you’ve made for the small self to be in agreement to where she will be taken is what supports you in reclaiming a world that may now be known to you in a higher way.”

“Now, the crucible you have is memory, and we will address this now. You have memory for a reason. You remember which way you drive to work, how this one or that one treated you. You remember the rules of how to cross the street, how to tie the shoes, perhaps how to treat the one beside you. And while we do not eradicate memory, we do realign it because much of memory is all projection as the small self claims things and gives them meaning.

“I don’t like the way she looked at me. That job was bad. That man was evil.”

Whatever these things have been that are imprinted in memory are still there as you encounter your day. So the alignment of memory in truth will in some ways be a displacement of what you have thought, or were led to believe, or agreed to that has claimed a memory that may be informing your life. Your attachment to what you think is there also rescinds the reality of truth, and the alignment to truth in what you see requires you to comprehend the reality of truth in what you have seen prior. Because you walk in illusion when you look at the past and you use that lens on your present—or your future, yes—you are in witness to a false perception when you rely on memory that is not in truth.”

In twelve step recovery  literature there is a powerful promise that is expressed as “we do not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.”

The past can continue to be a teacher but without the necessity of being controlled by it.

A major theme of tonight's lesson is to grow in awareness of of how many of our reactions to people, places and things have essentially been preprogrammed from our past beliefs and perceptions. Although this might be fairly obvious to us as we grow in awareness, it is sometimes difficult to become conscious of how enslaved we have become through our attachment to our past.

Affirming again:

“I know who I am in truth, I know what I am in truth, I know how I serve in truth. And I am the one who perceives the world made new. I am Word through this intention. Word I am Word.”

I have a past, but I am not my past.

“When we bring the psst into the present, we create a future just like our past.” ACIM

In love, grace and gratitude…

BOOK OF TRUTH 19

P. 310-318

When we affirm and acknowledge who we are, falsehood, scarcity, separateness or any thought or emotion that projects these things cannot exist.

I keep reminding myself of the difference between my older view of affirmation as compared to the work we are called to do here and that is to affirm, to claim a truth that is already here. We are not attempting to create something or even convince ourselves of a truth. We are reminding ourselves of what is already here. When I bring the words to mind either out loud or within myself, “I know who I am, I know what I am, I know how I serve,” I am affirming the truth of who I am beyond my thinking mind beyond my intellect, and as I do that, as I align myself to that truth, nothing else but that truth can exist in that moment.

If I were to affirm for myself “I am a Divine Child of God, but I hate you,” it just doesn't work. Now my personality self might want to hate you and might have very strong emotions of separation about you, but when I affirm the truth of my Divine self the other stuff just cannot stick.

The small self, however, does not go away and still needs to be attended to at times. Even though it is not who you are, it is an aspect of your physical existence, your form. It is a  part of your uniqueness or your unique expression of the Divine.

 “Now the action of fear you have been expressed as in truth will not attend to it. And as you say, “Yes, I am here in truth,” the invitations of fear will be released, as long as you do not agree to them. If you can imagine that you are sitting in a chair and the worst thing you can imagine is whispered in your ear, align to the truth of what you are and sing the song “I am here.” If the fear that you would imagine is expressed in your world, use it as an opportunity to claim the Kingdom, which is the awareness of the Creator in all manifestation regardless of what presents. And if the small self who seeks to be comforted requires it, hold her, teach her, but do not give her fear because she will be known in it. There is no need.”

This is such a beautiful reflection of the Divine self taking care of the ego/personality, this limited wounded part of ourselves. It is not simply being gentle with ourselves, although that is a piece of it, it is more about bringing our limited understanding of self to the Divine within so these perceptions and judgements might be healed and released.

I don't think I ever quite understood that's saying of Jesus about new wineskins until connecting with this passage from the book again.

“No one sews a piece of unshrunk cloth on an old garment. If he does, the patch tears away from it, the new from the old, and a worse tear is made. And no one puts new wine into old wineskins. If he does, the wine will burst the skins—and the wine is destroyed, and so are the skins. But new wine is for fresh wineskins. Mark 2:21-22

My personal challenge here is that my mind,my intellect, wants to understand, and the way it understands is by attempting to fit new information into previously known categories. If you were a librarian and a new book came to you, you would diligently work on fitting it into your Dewey Decimal system. Even if you created a new category or sub-category, you would still be using pre-existing information to create a “slot” this book would fit into.

Or when we are studying a work like this we would say, “Oh, that's just like…” The mind is then satisfied, but the soul is left hungry. A Course in Miracles helps to create a discipline that pushes us to let go of the minds limited understanding. For instance, when one of the meditations in the workbook states, “I don't know what anything means.” Now The Book of Truth will make a distinction between thinking and knowing. The knowing it refers to is the awareness of the soul of what is true even though it might defy logic and the self-imposed limitations of the thinking mind.

Another Insight is that the thinking mind is very goal-oriented and wants to finish things. Whereas the soul is continually evolving in love and has no created goal in mind other than the continuation of its evolution in love.

“The action of this text so far has been reclamation in manifestation. You must begin to expect that, as you attend to our words, as you attend to the teachings, as you witness your life, that the transformation of it will be in accord with what you require to know yourself in truth. There is no object here, no finish line, no trophy at the end. The gift of the Kingdom is the gift of union, and it is here and will be known by you as you say, “Yes.”
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“Q:  Can the Guides elaborate on the reference to the thunderbolt? They also talked about the facing of the self is not something to be frightened of, that it’s in glory. Can they add a little bit more about how this may present itself so we can work in congruence with the Divine Self as it embodies?”

(The thunderbolt referred to is on the bottom of p. 308:

“And in this alchemy, “I am agreeing to serve,” the thunderbolt comes and claims you each in an illumination in your field that will progress and reclaim you in the Kingdom. We have said it.” [Service is a reflection of the knowing We are all One])

“To know means to realize, and you only realize in the moment you stand in. You cannot know tomorrow, you cannot know yesterday. It happens in the now.”

“The stages of awareness and progression that one aligns as, as he calls the Kingdom into manifestation, will be highly dependent on the individual’s needs for evolution.”

“As we have taught you all, the small self’s investments about what should be will be seen by you. And as they are released, the True Self comes forth and witnesses the Kingdom that is already here. ”

“Q:  When I feel the contrast in others and when I see the small structures that you 

were talking about, instead of feeling blame or shame should I take that opportunity to see that as my bigger self?”

“Now, the old self seeks to re-create the known at every opportunity and it includes your reactions to the things in your world. As you move to the authority of the True Self as what you are, while the temptation may be there to recriminate, to fear, to blame, to argue, the tendency will be moving away because it is not in truth. ”

“Now Paul is interrupting us. “But sometimes we need anger.”

We reflected a bit on the biblical encounter of Jesus and the money changers in the temple 

John 2:13-16 New International Version (NIV)

13 When it was almost time for the Jewish Passover, Jesus went up to Jerusalem. 14 In the temple courts he found people selling cattle, sheep and doves, and others sitting at tables exchanging money. 15 So he made a whip out of cords, and drove all from the temple courts, both sheep and cattle; he scattered the coins of the money changers and overturned their tables. 16 To those who sold doves he said, “Get these out of here! Stop turning my Father’s house into a market!”

Here is the same passage from The Holy Spirit’s Interpretation of the New Testament:

“(v 15 – 19)1 That day in the temple, the apostles noticed a change in Jesus as he looked on at the money changers and merchants. 2He had been laughing and talking with the apostles on the way to the temple, but now he stood quiet and stoic, watching the activity there.

3“Master,” an apostle asked, “is something wrong?”

4Jesus did not answer the apostle, but stood quiet, alert to judgments in his mind. 5He did not believe these judgments, and he did not react based on them, but he noticed them and let them go from his mind. 6Then Jesus left the temple without saying a word. 7The apostles were surprised, for they had expected him to pray and to teach.”

I’ll let you sit with that.

“Q:  If the small self makes a decision out of fear or anger, how come the True Self doesn’t step in and show them something different or allow them to go through with that choice?”

This is a great question!

In past language we might have said, “Why did God let this happen?”

In our continuing process of growth we are constantly learning. Situations arise (which we might say have been created by the higher self--in other words, these situation and the lessons they contain have been chosen by us) that we are challenged to respond to.

So much of our choice, and our learning is involved with how we respond to these life situations. Both the ego/personality self/small self and the Divine Self, Higher Self, Christ consciousness  make choices.

This day, we are becoming more and more aware that the personality self will always choose in limitation, separateness and fear. For so many of us, this is the only way we knew ho to make choices. 

Personally, I knew that I had a soul that was made in the image and likeness of God and yet this soul of mine, this spiritual nature, seemed to have very little to do with my interaction with the world and situations I found myself in. Without me realizing it totally consciously, the majority of decisions I made were coming from this limited perception of myself.

It was not until fairly recently on this plane of learning, that I realized my Divine self also chooses. As my awareness grows, my ability to allow the Divine within me to choose becomes stronger and more obvious.

Now I do not want to go into that old imagery of an angel on one shoulder and the devil on the other. That is just another childish perception of duality. There is, however, an aspect of self which A Course in Miracles refers to as “the decider.”

“The decider” is an aspect of self that moves either in the direction of Love or of fear. If we are in limitation, if we are living in a state of limited awareness, of separation, with our personality selves, then there will certainly be a major influence in deciding to align with fear or safety or protection. When living in a deeper awareness of the truth of who we are, “the decider” will much more easily flow to that sense of unity and love.

Again, a personal reflection here, when confronted with numerous life situations I still find that my first reflexive response is often one of fear or  reflections of fear as anger, blame, shame, guilt. For years I made a valiant effort to attempt to eradicate all of these old knee-jerk reactions. To my dismay all of them still remain. 

I sense that my work now is not about eradicating some lifelong reflexive reactions to people, places, and things but to recognize immediately after a reflex or knee-jerk reaction occurs that I have a choice to either go in that direction of fear and separateness or to hold the situation and to respond to a differently. My work has raised my level of choice to choosing higher vibration rather than lower, even though my first inclination might be to be upset or angry or heard more ashamed.

Peace, in love and gratitude.